sparkling stars ☆

I don’t know why but I feel so insecure (as always) and I can’t describe how much I hate...

Fri, 17 May 2013 11:39:03 -0400

I don’t know why but I feel so insecure (as always) and I can’t describe how much I hate my appearance. My hair, my teeth,.my face, my tummy, my legs….and the list continues…. it’s not that I didn’t try to change but some things no matter how hard I try they wouldnt change they only go worse. It’s like wow what a sad life I live…. people are all so flawless except for me and only me

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Fri, 17 May 2013 11:38:31 -0400

benjavens: Plant Pot Repeat Pattern

Mon, 13 May 2013 09:52:33 -0400

benjavens:

Plant Pot Repeat Pattern

I felt that today was something like the "leave me alone to die" kind of day

Mon, 13 May 2013 09:51:00 -0400

Hi guys feeling as bad as ever I dont know why I think it’s because I got no one to talk...

Mon, 13 May 2013 09:40:36 -0400

Hi guys feeling as bad as ever I dont know why I think it’s because I got no one to talk to… Today is probably the loneliest day ever. I went for lunch alone. Studied/did work in the library alone. When some classmates came they asked me “eh how come you here?” I was so awkward I just replied “haha I was doing microecons the last week tutorial I havent finish” Then she walked away. They sat a few tables away and chatted loudly and laughed loudly. They didnt even come and say hi. Only one did, and she did it prolly cos she knew me longer. But still… It made me feel even sadder. And the surroundings were quite noisy with laughter and chatters, it wasnt like the normal ambiance of the library. Which made me feel even smaller, like the whole world was ignoring me and I was invisible. And I keot on messaging my sister on LINE to make myself feel more wanted…? I dont know…. I was feeling like that the whole day. When the time came for class I was late by a few mins and my classmate (the one mentioned above) called me to ask me where I was. I told her and I reached the classroom minutes after. Then I checked my whatsapp then I realise her message “Where you? the whole class is here except the tutor” then I thought to myself: I feel like a freaking loner. Or maybe I am one…. I walked into the class alone and most of the classmates turned to look.

Really really sad prolly one of the worst days ever.